This Is Where I Say Goodbye

I think I always knew this day was coming, but I didn't know when. But I suppose it's time to admit that the day has indeed arrived. The day that is very bittersweet. The day that I say good-bye to this blog. 

I started this blog ten years ago. I needed something to do and I loved to write. I started it before Rob and I were married as a way to follow along with wedding planning, but of course I was awful at actually sharing things. I posted very randomly, never quite sure what to write and mostly just forgetting I ever had it. 

However after we were married I did better. I actually wrote every single day of the week. I wrote about Stella, about cooking, about Christmas trees getting stuck to the porch. I really wrote about whatever was on my mind. There was no purpose or sense of order. I just stretched my creative chops and wrote about it all. 

My writing schedule changed when Addie came along, but I still maintained a 5 days a week schedule. I needed it as an outlet as we dealt with Addie's regression and getting her back on track. I continued to need it as I went through my miscarriages and infertility. 

But when Connor came, I changed to just three days a week because life with two kids is hard and busy. And if we are being perfect honest I struggled with both kids through my entire first year. It just takes me awhile getting back to feeling like me again. But of course just as I was starting to feel like me again, I dislocated my knee and ended up getting knee surgery which was a lot. 

And then Emma. Oh my dear Emma. She is like having three kids in the body of one. I love her to pieces but she is definitely my most spirited, aka most trouble. But of course I wouldn't trade her for the world. At the same time I have been running a successful sticker shop for the last three years. I have been doing it all alone and with only about two hours of actual working time each day. 

Behind just the fact of running a business on very few hours, maintaining a house, and having three kids, I find that I just don't have much to say. Since having Addie I have done a lot of writing about the kids, but as Addie has gotten older I feel less and less comfortable writing about her. And in turn, less and less about writing about the other two. In fact I don't really feel like I have much new to say. I think we can only put up with 'life with three kids is exhausting' so many times before we all go a little mad. 

So writing has become a chore for me. I don't have much to say, and it's all things I could easily share on my Instagram where I still regularly share photos. I just don't have the time, energy or desire to write much anymore. 

If we are being honest, I'm actually kind of sad to say goodbye to this blog. And for all I know I'll change my mind in two months and be back again but we all know I have been writing less and less these days. It's just hard to say this because it feels so final. It feels like I can't turn around and change my mind, which of course I could always change my mind. But I think I know that I won't. I think I know that this is goodbye to this blog, this creation of my mind that I have had for ten years. 

I'm not leaving the internet. I'll admit that I don't really do anything on Facebook. My Instagram pictures get posted to Facebook but otherwise I'm nonexistent there. But I do post on Instagram (@beccaevans08) often if you want to follow along with the kids and us. And hey if you need planner stickers, check out my Etsy shop (Beautiful Mess Plans Co). And I guess you never know I might show back up here again. 

I do want to say thank you for continuing to read for the last ten years. Thank you for caring to come back to each post and caring about our lives. I have tried to be nothing to be honest and true about us. We are messy and very much not picture perfect. But I have enjoyed capturing the moments and putting them here. 

Now, pardon me while I go mourn this goodbye a little...

Decorate with Me: Connor's Room

 After I finished working on the counter on the main floor I had some ideas of where I was going to move on to next in the house, but before I could really make up my mind Connor made it for me. He decided that he didn't want the pictures on his wall anymore and instead of asking for help ripped it off the wall, taking some of the wall with it. He later confessed that he didn't want to ask for help because he didn't want to make me sad. Those were frames and the theme I chose for his room when he was a baby. In fact 'just keep swimming' was something I told himself a lot while we were trying to get pregnant with him and going through miscarriages and infertility. 

But he was probably right, it was time to grow up his room. I had planned to do Addie's first but Addie told him that she didn't want her room changed so I put her room on the back burner. 

If there's something you should know about Connor it's this: he loves Superheroes, Hot Wheels and Legos. That pretty much sums him up. I didn't want to go with Hot Wheels or Lego so I went with Superheroes and I'll be honest I love how it turned out. 

However quick note I want to apologize for the messy room. I didn't have the time or the energy to straighten it before I snapped some photos. It's a little boy's room, so you get what you get, but I think you'll get the feel of it despite the mess. 

First we had moved out the dresser awhile before this because he just didn't need it and it gave him room for his hot wheel garage. And yes there is a giant pile of hot wheels in the corner. He actually has a far more room than it looks like here and if it's room is actually clean it's even more room, so just imagine that it's actually clean. 

All the inspiration of his room actually came from the avengers posts, although I'll get around to those later in the post. And then it quickly came together. 

One of the things that Connor asked for specifically was a family picture in his room. It seemed like a random request but he was pretty certain about it and kept asking for one so I put up that one from Easter last year. It was in an Ikea frame that I already had so that made it pretty cheap and easy. I did buy that little C and the wooden sign which is a quote from The Sandlot. I honestly don't remember where I got the sign from because I got it so long ago but it was on Etsy. The Avengers symbols were just blank and white pictures I found on the internet and put into frames that again I already had. Sometimes I think that this wall needs something else but I can't ever decide so for now I just leave it be. 

His other request was that I leave his mobile. I got that for him when he was a baby and I was planning on taking it down but he wanted me to keep it, so I kept it up. Again it was an Etsy find (I got one for Emma years later in different colors - they are seriously cute).

These Avengers frames were where the whole room stemmed from. I found these and knew these were exactly what we needed for his room. I got these posters first as the six original Avengers then later bought Spider-Man and Ant-Man later from an Etsy shop called My Geek Posters. You can find them here. I had to buy the frames but I found them all on Amazon for a decent price as a set. 

My original idea was to have the six heroes in two rows by his bed, but when we started putting them up we decided it was going to be both too high and too low, so Rob came up with the idea to put them like this which is what prompted me to buy the last two posters. And really it works really well. 

We also got the bedframe from his bed (it's from Wayfair) and although Rob really doubted me at first about if we really needed bed frames, he did even admit that it makes the room feel more finished. 

The top long picture was a gift he was given for Christmas. If you look at it from one angle then it's all the good guys but if you look the other way it's the bad guys. It's a pretty cool picture. 

But it's this sign that really adds something fun and cool into his room. I found this sign on an Etsy shop called FabWrapMyHairCrafts. It's a wood sign that has LED lights and he has a remote that he can change it as much as he wants to different colors or a fade effect and so forth. And when it's not lit up, it's just a stained wooden sign. It's very cool and I think it's Connor's favorite thing about his room. 

The last thing that we did was hang up all his masks. I was always picking up all his masks everywhere so I thought we could just use some 3mm hooks to hand all his masks (I haven't figured out how to handle his infinity gauntlet yet). It's a bit chaotic looking because I let Connor put where they went, but that's okay because it works. 

So that's his room. Should I have cleaned his room and had better lighting? Probably but I didn't, so there's that. I think you still got the idea of his room. 

Of course now that Connor has his room all finished Addie got a little jealous and decided she wanted her room done too. So now I'm working on her room as well. 

The 25 Month Comparison

 

Personally I think that Connor and Emma look a lot alike this month. I can still see the similarities between Addie and Emma but I think the younger two look a lot alike. I think part of that is just their hair. Connor is definitely my blondie, but their hair is almost the same here. Their faces are a lot the same here. Then there's my long girl, Addie. The other two, to me, don't look like Addie this month. 

Emma Lynn: 25 Months

 

Dear Emma::

It's hard to believe we are already a month out from being two! It seems like you were just turning one, but here we are sailing right past two! You are just growing too fast! 

But man we are heavy into the twos! I think I just blocked out what it's like to have a two year old but you are quick to remind me how exhausting two is! But at the same time, you are also so lively and excited. You are just observing everything, and taking in all that you can. Sometimes you take in too much and caught on to things faster than I could have ever thought possible. 

I don't think we go through a day without a temper tantrum of some kind. But that's all about being two and having your own mind and opinions. So we are working our way through those and how we deal with our feelings. You have the strongest temper of the three of you and the is definitely reflected in your tantrums. You just have big feelings and you don't know how to deal with them.

You still love looking through books. There are always piles of books everywhere from where you sat and looked through them. You also love Barbies as well. In all fairness, you call all dolls Barbies but you do love actual Barbies too. I often finding you sitting in Addie's room playing with her Barbies and Barbie house. 

You favorite show, hands down, is Bluey. It's a short show on Disney that you can't seem to get enough of. It's one of the few things that you will actually sit through and watch without getting up and leaving at some point. We have been watching some princess movies lately - you haven't seen too many up to this point because your brother isn't a fan of princesses. But you have been actually saying princess so we have been running through them and you have been enjoying the movies. 

Lately you have started doing more pretend play by "making" dinner with all the new play food you got for Christmas. You fuss around with the play food, put some on a tray then come around the corner and say "dinner!" with a big smile on your face. It's pretty dang cute. And you get a lot of joy out of me pretending to eat the food you make as well. 

A lot of the big stuff is the same as the month better. You continue to be a bit of a picky eater because you know I can't force you to eat. You still sleep well, although some days you do everything you can to not nap. There has been days that you play in your room instead of sleeping, but most of the time you still nap luckily. You definitely still need that nap. 

You are doing so well talking now. There is still a lot of gibberish but you have some so far and continue to process day by day. I am so happy to hear you talking. It also makes days easier when I can figure out what you want and what you think. 

You are just in such a fun age. It's exhausting for sure, but it also amazing. You are such a beautiful light and I love spending my days with you. I love you so much. 

Love, Mama

2021 Planners

 Okay so I'm going to start this off by saying that I know that there is a lot here. I'm not dumb, but not all of these will be used every day and each have a purpose. Heck, not all are even planners, but I just wanted to share everything that I'm using next year. I have also tried to combine all into one system but I just don't love it all combined. I don't know if that makes me weird but I like having things separate. 

Yes, like I said that is quite a pile but I will be sharing each one and its purpose and it's really not as bad as it seems, I promise. Or maybe it does because you don't plan at all, but keep in mind that planning and stickers and all that is not only my business but also my hobby. I love using planners and writing things down, so I enjoy all of it. 

So in no particular order, let's start with my health and fitness planner. This is my first year using a health and fitness planner in the classic Happy Planner size. I have been using a health/fitness planner for years now but I have always used a mini, but I have found in the last year that I just wanted more room to just write. So I'm giving this classic size a try, and to be honest I am really really excited. I am ready to make the move now but I'm waiting until the first. This one does travel with me regularly in my planner bag and I do use it every single day. 

This planner is my cleaning planner. I have had this planner for the last six months or so because this is a 18 month planner. I use this planner to track my zone cleaning and what I need to do each day and also it gives me a place to look back and see how long it's been since I've done a certain task so I make sure I hit all the areas of the house when cleaning. It's actually been working really well. One of these days I'll write about my new cleaning routine, but I plan to continue using this planner right into the new year. This planner sits either on my desk or on the kitchen counter and just set it up the weekend before the next week. It's one I reference every day but I don't carry it or really use it every day other than to check out tasks completed.  (EDIT:: I have actually already decided to change this cleaning planner to another one just because I wanted something smaller. I will share about my cleaning and the other planner at some point. I should note that sometimes I have trouble with committing to a planner. It's also fun to change things up!)

This Happy Planner classic is my budget planner for the new year. Last year I used a Happy Planner for budgeting and finances and it really worked really well, so I'm going to continue on using this into the new year. This isn't one I even look at every day but I do finances in general Monday, Wednesday and Friday so I have a routine with this, but it's not one I carry around with me because I don't need access to to every day. 

It wouldn't be my planner stack if I didn't have a bullet journal. I have been using a bullet journal since 2017 and I would be lost without it. I have on several occasions tried other methods of planning but I always come back to the bullet journal because it just works for me. I am just now getting around to setting this one up which is late for me, but that's okay. I'll have it ready for the new year and I'm excited for the switch. Plus the color is really pretty. This is of course an every day carry because it holds my brain. 

This is a change for me this year because this is my work planner. For the last two years I used a Hobonichi weeks, but I needed a change this year and I wanted a slightly bigger size to it. So I ordered a coiled B6 from LightsPlannerAction (this cover on my planner is from The Planner Society) and I'm so excited to get into it. I think it's going serve me so much better. It will take me a bit to get my groove with such a different planner and size but I am excited to start it! This is one that I will sometimes have in my planner bag but often will just stay on my desk because I don't need it unless I'm working. 

This is one that I just started using last month and it has done me very well. This is a B6 rings and I have set up with an odd assortment of inserts. So originally I wanted to just set it up because it sounded like a fun but then I seriously wanted to find a use for it. Sometimes I was missing in my week was a look at my week as a whole. Basically I have tried to put a weekly spread into my bullet journal but I kind of hate it so I just do monthly and daily, which serves me well but sometimes it nice to see all the things I have to do or packages coming or whatever for the entire week up front. So I set this up for that purpose and it sits open on my desk on whatever week it is so I can reference it. I also have monthlies which will give me a place to quickly reference when I get a call and need to make an appointment (although I do have a family calendar by our fridge but the kids are noisy so I usually end up in the office). I have another set of monthlies that will serve to keep track of blog posts instead of in my bullet journal which will work really well I think. I have a few other sections like project planning where I have all the plans laid out for Addie's room (the current room we are redoing) and then just extra notes and lists sheets in the back. I originally put this together because I thought it would be fun but this has definitely become one I look at every single day. 

This one is a tiny little A6 Stalogy. It's just blank graph paper that I plan to use with a devotional as a faith journaling/prayer journal. This one is a new way of doing it but I think it will work great and will give me freedom to use it as I need/want to. 

This one is new to the lineup this year. Last year I did a big Happy Planner memory keeper, but I decided that I didn't want to that again this year. I am glad I tried it and honestly it was quite a year to give it a shot and I had a lot more pictures than I would have if my kids had been in school all last spring. I was able to capture all the at home school we did and although I don't want to repeat it I can at least remember it. But there have been a lot of weeks where nothing has happened and I only took two pictures all week and now I have this giant spread and I hate how it ends up looking. But I am proud that I haven't missed a week, but I'm ready to pack it up. 

All that to say that this notebook is going to be my new creative journal. I wanted a place to still capture moments and write. I have my brain dump journal where it's writing and one that no one gets to see. But this one will have pictures. I will practice water coloring. I will add pictures and memories. I really enjoy creative journaling and that way I can still capture those fun moments but if I have a week where I just don't feel good or nothing happened I don't feel pressured to still put something together. I'm actually really excited about doing this this year. So this definitely won't be an everyday notebook but as I want and when I have time. 

This is also a new one for me. I have been thinking about doing a book/reading journal for a long time now, but I never got around to it. So this year I'm going to give it a try. I'm pretty excited about it. I even have the insides already set up or planned out and I think it's going to work out really well. I wanted a place to document my reading goals and pages read, but also books I read and what I thought and such. I think it will be a fun addition, but definitely not an every day thing. It's pretty much just for when I finish a book. 

This one is always a not fun one, but I have to meal plan. I usually meal plan on Fridays then finalize my grocery list and get it in my phone Sunday and go shopping on Monday. It works well for me. I had a book almost exactly like this this last year and it worked well for me. I get weirdly picky about my meal planning book, but this system seems to be working. I like having the year in a book so I can always go back and look at what we ate in the past when I am stuck on ideas for what to feed us. This is just a once a week thing, thank goodness and stays on my kitchen counter by my cookbooks. 

This last one is my Erin Condren vertical which I use for memory keeping. Basically I play with sticker kits and all my stickers, and each evening I look back at the day and put down stickers about what I did that day. I don't include pictures but just have fun with stickers. It is fun to do and I have been doing this for a couple years now and they are so fun to look back on. This one stays on my nightstand (I do this planner in bed in the evening) but I do use it every day (or make notes in my phone if I'm just too tired). 

I will say that I have one more coming that isn't here yet. It's more along the lines of the creative journaling however but I plan to use it almost as a fauxbonichi where I do different challenges. I plan to do doodle challenges, handlettering challenges, journaling prompts. Just something fun to do each other. I'm looking forever to it but I don't have it yet. 

So there you have it. There is my crazy amount of planners and notebooks. It's really not so bad when you realize that not all of them will be used on a daily basis. I'm not that crazy. But for almost all of these I have been using these systems for the last year and it really does work well for me. I have found my groove and not only does it keep my life (and the kids life and even the hubs) together but I also enjoy it. Sometimes Rob gives me a hard time for writing everything down but truthfully I would be lost without them all and I love them all equally but differently - except for the meal planner. I really hate meal planning, there's nothing fun there...

Merry Christmas

 Merry Christmas from my weird chaotic clan.

It's hard to believe how much we have changed over the last nine years. 

I hope everyone has an amazing holiday, no matter how you celebrate or who you are able to celebrate with this year. 

Friday Five

 1. I got a new sweatshirt. It is so soft and cute. And it's my new favorite thing. 

2. I have been using the same journal for years. I have probably about fifteen of them in my cedar chest. Well I am starting to get close to the end of my current on so I went looking for a new one but then I learned they aren't really available anymore. I am seriously crushed. I don't always handle change well and this was pretty heartbreaking for me actually. So now I'm on the hunt. I am oddly picky about my journals. 

3. I am always looking for hacks for keeping your glasses from fogging while wearing your mask, especially outside in the cold. It is rough. I do normally wear my contacts but sometimes I just want to wear my glasses because my head hurts or my eyes are dry with the winter. The most recent hack I have tried is putting a small layer of shaving cream on my glasses than gently wiping it off. It kind of works. It works better than nothing at all, although my glasses don't fog but actually get wet on the inside. It's kind of weird but I can see better through the wet than through the fog. (I have also tried soap and water and letting my glasses air dry and it's pretty much the same effect. I also sometimes just make sure my glasses are sitting on top of my mask but it's all just frustrating to get to work properly.)

4. I did my nails with some Polish Pops Christmas wraps and they turned out pretty cute. (And I am clearly not a hand model...)

5. Anyone else feel like this has been a killer week. It has just been so long and never ending.